When it HURTS to Say ‘No’


Several years ago, I taught a Take Back Your Temple small group class and a common theme emerged: Many of the ladies had problems saying ‘No’.

hurts to say no

Because they were so busy saying ‘Yes’ to everyone, they didn’t have much time left to take care of themselves.

So food became the one way they allowed themselves to rest and enjoy.

But there was only one problem with that “solution;” they could not say ‘No’ to foods that they knew were hurting them either!

What do you do when you avoid saying ‘No’ because you fear the hurt that can come from it?

That hurt can come from fearing other people’s disapproval or the temporary pain that comes from denying your flesh.

However, on my own successful weight loss journey, I learned that you are going to have to say ‘No’ to some things in order to say ‘Yes’ to your life!

With my class, I wanted them to see ‘No’ in a new way.

I brought in an image of the word ‘No’ decorated with butterflies and flowers.

I told them that I decorated the word because I wanted them to see it as less scary when they had to say it.

Then, I had them practice saying the word “No.”

We laughed about it, but I made my point.

After all, the things we say ‘Yes’ or ‘No’ to on a daily basis are shaping our lives:

  • What are you saying ‘Yes’ to? Your daily choices show it.
  • What are you saying ‘No’ to? Your choices show that too.

Consider this: Are you saying ‘Yes’ to God through the thoughts you think and the decisions you make?

You say ‘Yes’ to God when you cultivate thoughts that agree with His word. You say ‘No’ to your flesh when you reject those thoughts that don’t.

You say ‘Yes’ to God when you act in ways that bring peace and joy through the Holy Spirit. You say ‘No’ to your flesh and the enemy when you reject behaviors that take away your peace and make you feel guilty.

Say it with me – saying ‘No’ to your flesh can hurt!

But it hurts less when you remind yourself that you are living in light of eternity. You believe Jesus’ word that you have eternal life in Him.

The choices you make in this life are training you for eternal life. In 2 Timothy 2:1-7, the apostle Paul compares us to soldiers, athletes, and farmers.

Soldiers, athletes, and farmers endure hardship for a short time for an even greater reward later.

So while you may hurt temporarily by saying ‘No,’ what you are doing is saying ‘Yes’ to your life ultimately.

Remember: everything on this Earth is temporary, which includes any hurt you feel.

When you consider your ‘yes’ and ‘no’ carefully, you are ensuring that you are being a good steward of all the Lord has given you. This includes your time, your talent, and yes, your physical health!

God has promised a sure reward for those who diligently seek Him. So be encouraged, knowing that any hurt is temporary but your reward will be eternal.

Be blessed in health, healing, and wholeness,

Kimberly Taylor

Author of the Take Back Your Temple program

P.S. Are you ready to take back what belongs to you? The Take Back Your Temple program will be your guide.

3 John 1:2 says,

Beloved, I pray that you may prosper in all things and be in health, just as your soul prospers.”

If you are excited about your future and know that your health habits are supplying you with energy to maximize your present and future, then you don’t need the Take Back Your Temple program.

You are already on a good road.

However, if you are sensing that your current habits are standing in the way of your better future, then that is where I can help. I can help you uncover those roadblocks that are standing in the way of reaching your best weight.

Come join me on the journey to better health in the Take Back Your Temple program, starting today. Let’s go farther – together.

About the author 

  • Thank You! I’ve been contemplating giving up sugar or baked treats and I hate to say it but the thought of never ever having cake again made me really sad yesterday and having some Lemon pound cake only made it worse. I’ve been going back and forth with it. I’m not overweight but food is a problem and want my body to be able to function the way it needs to as I walk in God’s calling for my life. I also don’t want to sabotage myself.

  • I thank you so much for recreating taking back your temple I have lost almost 40 something pounds and I am at my goal weight so take him back your temple has really helped me so I just want to say thank you

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