Like a person who develops a scab over a physical injury, so an emotional injury can cause a hard heart. The enemy can convince you that hardening your heart is necessary to protect you from further hurt.
I attended a conference on healing and deliverance many years ago and the minister who spoke on the subject of hard hearts called people with this condition, “Tough cookies.”
We will cover the following in this article:
The Danger of a Hard Heart
If a person has a hard heart, they won’t believe God’s love.
Believing God’s love puts them in a position of vulnerability and humility, which scares them.
They also won’t receive God’s word because it can’t penetrate through a hard heart.
Or if it does, the Word won’t go very deep!
God’s word must be able to penetrate the heart and grow in order to produce the fruit of the Spirit: love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, goodness, faithfulness, gentleness, and self-control (see Galatians 5:22-23).
Here is another sobering thought: A person can even try to minister to others from a hard heart!
But love won’t motivate their service.
They will serve out of legalism, duty, obligation, drudgery, a sense of shame or guilt. It is obvious they do not find joy in their service either.
The Cure for Hardness of Heart
The Lord gave me this Word on the cure for a hard heart:
Unless you allow the Lord to heal your heart, you will never progress past the place of your wounding.”
The only thing I know that is strong enough to soften a hard heart is the blood of Jesus.
Here are some truths about Jesus that can help a person exchange their hard heart for a soft heart – if the person will believe.
My prayer for a person suffering from a hard heart is below.
Know this:
- Jesus suffered.
- Jesus was wounded.
- Jesus was abused.
- Jesus was battered.
- Jesus was rejected.
- Jesus was lied on and talked about.
- Jesus was insulted and verbally abused.
- Jesus had to endure poverty.
There is nothing that any of us has suffered that Jesus did not go through already.
Consider this: Jesus took on the sins of the whole world at the cross, from the beginning of time, all through the ages.
That means Jesus had to bear the sins of:
- Murderers
- Adulterers
- Fornicators
- Homosexuals
- Rapists
- Child molesters/Pedophiles
- Abusers
- Thieves
- Liars
- Gossipers
- Slanderers
In fact, every perversion and evil that mankind has committed throughout history, Jesus bore it.
Nobody’s sin was left out.
Jesus bore the sins of the person who hurt you. Jesus bore your sins as well.
Jesus had to take all the filthiness of sin on Him at the cross even though He never sinned.
Jesus did that to restore mankind’s relationship with the Father.
The Father had decreed the penalty for sin was death. Jesus paid the death price for all of us because He loved us that much.
Jesus has suffered as we have, but we have NOT suffered as He has!
Jesus died and took all that sin with Him into the grave. But praise God, Jesus gained the victory over sin, conquered death, and came up out of the grave!
He rose again on the third day so that we can have a new life in Him.
He did this because He loves us. Not because we are good but because He is good.
Neither death nor life, nor angels nor principalities nor powers, nor things present nor things to come, nor height nor depth, nor any other created thing, shall be able to separate us from the love of God which is in Christ Jesus our Lord (see Romans 8:38-39).”
We who believe in our hearts and confess with our mouths that Jesus is the Son of God and was raised on the third day shall be saved because we trade our sin for His righteousness.
He heals the broken heart and binds up our wounds.
He gives us beauty for ashes, the oil of joy for mourning, the garment of praise for the spirit of heaviness so we may be the planting of the Lord and He may be glorified.
To summarize, a hard-hearted person is like an abandoned concrete lot.
Nothing much will grow there and what does grow is malnourished, weak, and sickly.
In order for anything to grow, the concrete must be broken up, the chunks removed, new soil brought in, and good seeds planted.
Prayer for the Hardened Heart
My prayer for a hard-hearted person is from Ezekiel 36:26:
May my sister or brother receive a new heart and a new spirit within them; May the Lord take the heart of stone out of their flesh and give them a heart of flesh so that they may receive the full measure of the Father’s love for them.
I command any evil spirits deceiving them into thinking that a hard heart is necessary for their safety and protection to come up and come out in the name of Jesus.
The Lord is their rock and their fortress and their deliverer; My God, their strength, in whom they will trust; their shield and the horn of their salvation, their stronghold.
Spirits of shame, depression, anger, pride, woundedness, unforgiveness, fear, rejection, poverty, hurt and anything else in their souls and bodies that the Father did not plant, I uproot you through the power of our Father’s word in the name of Jesus!
Spirit of trauma, I command you to come out and loose them in the name of Jesus. They have been set free to grieve for their losses and to allow proper expression of them in their Savior’s loving arms. They are free to walk in freedom and to dance in praise to the Lord!
I see a new picture of them as dancing before the Lord, face radiant with joy, arms open wide rather than crossed, completely free to receive.
Let them declare according to Psalm 30:11-12:
“You have turned for me my mourning into dancing;
You have put off my sackcloth and clothed me with gladness,
To the end that my glory may sing praise to You and not be silent.
O Lord my God, I will give thanks to You forever.”
The Lord is glorified when His people are well-watered gardens, trees of righteousness, full of fruit.
His Word is good seed; his Holy Spirit is our water that brings times of refreshing in His presence.
As well-watered gardens with abundant fruit, others can come, taste and see that the Lord is good!
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Very beautiful article and prayer. Thank you so much for sharing it with me.
You are welcome, Barbara and I give all praise to God for the opportunity!
My ex-wifes hardened heart cost us our marriage of 44 years. It is kvery sad because it didn’t have to happen. But God has restored my hearts desire to have a new, deep emotionally healthy relationship
I’m grateful for His love for me.
Amen, Randy – Jesus loves us and I praise Him with you for restoration.
Awesome, Awesome word, and ty. I remember when I felt this and going though. The Lord showed me to let all bitterness go and trust Him. I felt something in my heart , maybe the hurt and pain. But God took it away and I can not thank God for the transformation. Ty Mrs. Kim for helping me God bless you and all that you do for me/ us.
You are welcome, Renee – God is good!
This was a really good word. One of our adult children is going through a very difficult season and we are praying against hardening of the heart. This was very helpful. Thank you!
You are welcome, Maria and I join you in prayer for your child!
Thank you for these words.
You are welcome, Dede – God is good!
Thank you Mike and Kim for your encouragement. And to remind me how much Jesus loves me I’m His favorite the apple of His eye.
Exactly, Renee – we are fearfully and wonderfully made!
After reading much of your material today, dear Kimberly, I’m realizing I have allowed my own heart to harden and need many prayers for softening and healing of my heart and the hearts of my husband and daughters, as well as wisdom and clarity from the Lord in regard to what to do next in this journey called life. I think that the biggest issue for me that makes me unintentionally reject God’s love (and even the love of my dear husband of more than 32 years) is the diagnosis I received at the age of 22 from which I have pleaded with the Lord to deliver me. I am now 50 years old and still struggle with this disorder and it feels like a label and sometimes even a crutch. Lord, I ask for Your forgiveness for allowing my heart to harden and for rebelling against You, at times, by running to food and not to You. I ask for Your peace and love to penetrate my heart and mind and spirit and soul and the fruit of Your Holy Spirit to be so evident in my life and the life of my dear family so that You receive all of the glory and others come to know Your perfect Son, Jesus, as their Lord and Savior.
I know that my words turned into a prayer, Kimberly. I’m hoping many will read this and also pray for us. Thank you in advance to all who do pray. May God richly bless you lives in Jesus’ Name and for His Sake, Amen
I join you in prayer, Lori – Jesus is the Great Physician. May He heal you to the uttermost!
Hi Jenny,
I have been trying to feel Gods love for over 30 years. My heart is so hard nothing gets in. I feel like there is always a battle in my mind. When I read my bible, when I pray and always. Negative thoughts nonstop. I recently figured out that I am a narcissist and have been trying to change but nothing ever does. I cryout to God to help and guide me through. I feel like i dont know how to love. Didn’t recieve much growing up and always felt alone. As an adult I married into a good christian family and always felt like a fake. I have been diagnosed with 12 things and a few of them life threatening and alter my living. All of this has lead me to depression. What am I doing wrong that God won’t change my heart after serching for the spirit for so long. I want a new heart more then anything.
Any insite or guidance would be greatly appreciated.
Hi Colleen – this is Kim, the author of the ‘Ministering to a Hard Heart’ article. I believe I have insight into why someone might have a hard time believing and receiving God’s love. I wrote about that in this article: https://takebackyourtemple.com/for-god-so-loved/ . I pray the Lord illuminate this issue in your life, exchange a heart of stone for a heart of flesh, and receive His healing from this issue so that you can move forward rather than remain stuck in the past.
God has been removing my heart of stone over this last year and healing me emotionally. I thought I was so tough but I’m finding I have to allow myself to feel the pain for Him to heal it. He has met me every time. He doesn’t stop with just forgiveness, as great as that is, but He desires to heal us because He loves us. I’m so grateful.
Amen, Carol – praising the Lord with you!
I praise God the this article this morning. My heart is becoming hard and I am struggling with praying and reading the Word.
Hi Jenny – I am glad you posted and appreciate your transparency. I agree with you in prayer that the Lord replace a heart of stone with a heart of flesh according to His promise in Ezekiel 36:26: “I will give you a new heart and put a new spirit within you; I will take the heart of stone out of your flesh and give you a heart of flesh.” I pray that His Holy Spirit bring comfort to your heart and peace to your mind that will guard both by Christ Jesus.
Amen I understand, life is very hard at times. God Bless .
This speaks to me.
I am glad to hear it, Felice. I pray the prayer I wrote become a reality in your life as you receive the Lord’s healing and peace that surpasses all understanding to guard your heart and mind by Christ Jesus.
Praise to the glory of God
Thank you for that confirmation, Vicki!
Excellent
Thank you for that feedback, Paula!
My heart has become hardened due to my deceased husband’s unfaithfullness. It has been almost eight years and although I am very lonely I cannot allow myself to be hurt again
Hi Kathleen – my heart goes out to you; I cannot imagine the hurt and betrayal you feel from what your deceased husband did. My prayer for you is that the Lord fulfill His word in Psalm 147:3: “He heals the brokenhearted And binds up their wounds.” I pray He show you the people to whom He called you to share your Spiritual gifts with and comfort with the comfort that you receive. I pray His perfect love cast out all fear and that His joy become your strength. In that way, you can release the chains of the past and move forward into the brighter future He has for you – healthy, healed, and whole. ❤
My heart has become hardened through sin ,deceit and rebellion.Lord Jesus restore my life ,restore and deliver my soul from mental anguish,lead me into the path of right relationship with you and peace.Lord help me
Amen, John – that is a prayer our Father will answer because His desire is always to welcome His children back. See the story of the Lost Son in Luke 15:11-32 because that reveals the Father’s heart of love to us. He specializes in reconciliation and restoration!
I’ve had a hard heart for years. Between my childhood, 2 failed marriages, addictions to multiple things; I have become deeply ashamed, depressed, and angry. Please pray for me. Thank you
Hi Stephen – I will pray with you that the Lord heal your heart of from your past pain and reveal that we have a Savior in Jesus who understands our sorrows. He suffered in His flesh and is compassionate towards us. May you arise to newness of life, knowing that you are forgiven and accepted in the Beloved!
I lost my 28 year old son, husband, father, brother, and three best friends over the last two years. I didn’t mean to make my family a god but I did. After finding my sons body, I was greatly traumatized. I desperately want to return to God and repent of idolatry. My heart feels so hard. Please pray for me.
My heart goes out to you, Tammy! I join you in prayer the Lord fulfill His promise: “He heals the brokenhearted And binds up their wounds (Psalm 147:3).”
I would add just one thing to the dangers of a hardened heart, and how it develops. It isn’t just the Enemy who convinces us about needing to protect ourselves. It has been my own unbelief and distrust of God, and my prideful self-will that says “I WILL be in control.” When deeply wounded, we feel justified in our anger, and anger (even when it is hidden and subconscious) helps us feel powerful over the source of our pain. We say essentially, “I will FIX this myself.” But to live this way, we have to harden our hearts toward God, because His call is to surrender my Will.
Great point, Jan. I have an article called, ‘Confronting the Lies of Rebellion’ that speaks to this very issue 🙂
To EMPHASIZE these truths for me, God sent another, totally separate email “Word” about a Hardened Heart via another devotional that came into my Inbox RIGHT after yours! Of all subjects, this one hit me twice yesterday!
I LOVE how the Lord confirms His word, Jan!
This reading and prayer is so Right On for where I’ve been for many years. I’ve been aware of my woundedness but not very aware of my heart being hardened. Or why I have had so much difficulty “getting it” and receiving His LOVE for me. I have clung to my “drugs of choice” because of this.
Thank you for all of this! And the glory be to God my Father, to Jesus Christ, and the Holy Spirit!
I am so thankful that the Lord enlightened you to this issue, Jan. He is our Healer and can heal all wounds great and small. I pray His comfort and peace will cover you continually as He changes your heart.
Thank you for this message. I have been praying for our Father to change my heart of stone and give me a heart of flesh. This is just what I needed to hear.
You are welcome, Kimberly! A heart of stone is HEAVY. I agree with you in prayer for your healing and lasting change
Oh how your message is ministering to me. A couple of hours ago I asked the Lord to please let my spirit join with His spirit so I know His presence.
I am glad to hear that the message is helpful to you, Amy and stand in agreement with you in prayer!
What a wonderful article! I love this! Puts things right into crystal clear perspective.
Thank you, Kimberly!
You are welcome, Marianne – our Father is good!
Just the other day was praying that God would take my heart of stone and give me a heart of flesh, that He would write His truth on my heart and cause me to walk in His ways. Thanks for this post and please add me to your prayers.
You are welcome, Lorena – you have our prayers!
I feel the same way
Truth. Thank you. I am afraid that I have this hard heart. Not wanting it, but knowing that it is here. I fear it breaking down as of now I am trying to figure out how to protect myself from being stabbed again. It has been 19 years of dealing with hurts upon hurts and me trying to hold the high ground, forgiving and pretending it’s okay. Well, it hasn’t been okay, and I have slowly been building a wall. The last hurt was nearly 3 weeks ago and I have cried daily since, wrestling with what can be done to stop all the pain. I am tired of doing the same…forgiving and opening up again for the next stab. I am too tired, too exhausted, too weak to even talk to this person now. I have desired reconciliation, think it has happened, and only to be disappointed at the next blow. Thank you for your prayers. I desire God’s best, yet truly do fear one more time will be the death of me…a mental breakdown.
Hi Hurting – my heart goes out to you. You wrote about, “…forgiving and pretending it’s okay…” Although the Lord calls us to forgive, He doesn’t call us to pretend everything is okay. You did not mention the nature of the relationship you are in, however based upon what you wrote, it doesn’t appear to be healthy for you, particularly if you fear this person’s repeated violation of your trust will lead to a mental breakdown or “the death of you”. Our God is about life in abundance! I pray that you will seek a Christian counselor who will listen to you and advise you. Some relationships that are toxic require that we limit association with that person or break it off completely for our own sanity. However, a Christian counselor could help you in seeing the situation with greater clarity.
God bless you and hold you in His arms! Your experience almost exactly mirrors mine, only the deep losses and stabs have been since childhood right up until 6 months ago. Over six decades. I’ve been emotionally crippled by them.
Or as Madonna sings “You’re frozen when your heart ‘s not open.”
Amen! Don’t think I’ve ever seen Madonna quoted on this website, but this quote fits! 🙂
Thank you for this. I am this heart. Please pray for me.
I am joining you in prayer that the Lord will give you a new heart that is receptive to Him. He has promised to heal the brokenhearted and bind up their wounds. Often a broken heart proceeds a hard heart!
Kimberly, I read your blog, I just want to concur with you. We serve a good Good God. Keep on doing what you are ordained to do, Ministering to others who are in pain. That’s what I do on a daily basis, is reaching out and touching someone who need a word from Heaven. I thank you for being a bold soldier in the army of the Lord. You are always encouraging others, But sometimes the encourager needs to be encouraged. May God continue to Rain down His Blessings upon you and your family. Diane Stevenson.
Thank you for your encouragement, Diane – may the Lord bless you in your ministry as well. The end goal is to finish well in the Lord and nothing in this world compares to that. Stay blessed, Sister!
My Son and daughtinlaw both have hearts of stone. They have three little ones Evie is 8, Breila is 6, and Dane is 4 ! I am Papa 72 and it hurts me to see my Son and daughtinlaw both with hearts of stone and no compassion not even for there little babies. I Pray, and Pray and Pray for the Lord to remove there hearts of stone and give them a heart of flesh and Love and Compassion for all !
They love the babies but they show no compassion at all for them and that really hurts me! I’ve tried to talk to my Son who wasn’t raised like that but nothing changes. I know that if they both started getting into the Bible of life that they would begin to see everything in a different way! All I can do is keep PRAYING and keep my faith that the Lord will change there hearts and souls !
Please help me with PRAYERS so this family will have a life like GOD wants all of us too have !!!
I thank you and GOD Bless all of you!
Papa MIKE!!
Wow, I am so sorry to hear that, Papa Mike! But we know nothing is too hard for our God. I join you in prayer that the Lord will exchange the hearts of stone in your son and daughter-in-law for a heart of flesh, that His love saturates their hearts and minds, and that His word falls on fertile ground to bring forth 100-fold harvest in their lives. Not only that, but your grandchildren come to know the love of God at a young age, come to salvation in Jesus Christ, and be a voice for truth and righteousness in their generation. Keep the faith, my brother!
Hi! I read your article about Ministering to a Hard Heart. Very informative. I am deaf and I need help on what should I include in a letter to a hearing friend who has a hard stubborn heart and encourage her to ask Jesus to help her. I was in same predicament as she is now. Please advice. God bless you!
Hi Trish – Thank you for writing! I would just write to your friend that this article was a blessing to you and that you wanted to share. Then include a link/copy of the article. I recommend that you also pray that the Lord exchange her heart of stone for a heart of flesh and that she receive the message in the spirit of love in which it is intended.
God bless you in your ministry to your friend!
Enlightening thank you
Glad to hear it, Bonnie!
Thank you so much for this powerful, Holy Spirit inspired prayer! I have prayed for my daughters.
Wonderful, Stacey – I am agreeing with you in prayer that the blessings of the prayer be manifested in your daughter’s lives!
WOW, Kim, This was totallly awesome, so many times we think that we’re over a relationship only to have the enemy bring it back up again and we feast on the details of the relationship, this was a real eye opener, and I hope more people read it and receive from it and Pray the Prayer of Faith and the blood of Jesus to be set free to be who God want’s us to be for HIM..
Amen, Roberta!
Immensely blessed by this devotional. So many wounds upon wounds…it touched deep places and went into every nook & cranny of the fiber of my being. In the name of YESHUA, real healing begins today for me. The LORD has completely set me free, by faith in HIS word. The enemy’s no hold over my mind and heartwounds anymore. I give it all to the FATHER. Amen
I am agreeing with you in prayer, Jami – you will experience such freedom in Him. May the Lord heal you to the uttermost!
Really good post. Lots of great content lately! Thank you
You are welcome, Amanda – may the Lord continue to prosper you in health as your soul prospers!
Thank you Kimberly Taylor for sharing. Healing has begun in the “hard heart”. I’m decreeing and declaring the Word of God over my anger.
I am glad to hear that, Nanama – may the Lord continue to give you perfect peace as you keep your mind stayed on Him because you trust in Him!
This devotional was shared with me. I will definitely share it. Thank you.
Terri Mays
You are welcome, Terri – God is good!
Thanks!! God bless you!
All praise to our Lord!
This really spoke to me. I was just sharing with someone a few days ago that “I’m just not built” to give a certain person the “attention” she needs. I went on to say that “I’ve lived through so much trauma in my life that I just can’t go there. I have to protect myself.” So, WOW, this did, indeed, speak loudly to me. It’s no coincidence that I used the word “trauma” (which I’ve never used to describe my experiences), and you prayed against the “spirit of trauma.” (Thank you, Jesus!) The Lord has enlightened me, and I feel deliverance is at hand. God bless you, Kimberly. Keep allowing the Lord to use you.
You are welcome, Renee – may you prosper and be in health as your soul prospers!
This is helping go forward and receive Jesus love for me thank you Jesus and thank you so much for all that you do for Christ Jesus
You are welcome, Osha – I thank the Lord for the opportunity!
As I was laying sleeping tears was just coming in my eyes down my cheek. Even if I write I’ve been suffering way too long and I at my wick ends. Tomorrow I turn 48 if Lord will but a prisoner of self destruct. Indulging in over eating which inspirrel out my control. Knowing they say I have an autoimmune disease I still allowed myself to go downward. Silently as I am bruised his word keep coming. I ask why am I not strong enough. Although reading this hit hard on all levels. My realty comes like a thief as I was typing. My husband ask me which I don’t like bananas on strawberry because he ordered me a birthday cake. Since every time I try to get on track the enemy don’t want me to.
Hi Yonder – the truth is that NONE of us are strong enough to overcome our weaknesses by ourselves. But as Believers in Jesus, His Spirit lives on the inside of us. He enables us to do what we cannot do on our own. In this way, He gets the victory when we overcome, not us. He has begun a good work and will complete it until the day He returns. The enemy has no hold on us. Our bodies are God’s territory. It is up to us to reinforce the truth and walk in it with God’s help, day by day and choice by choice. Because Jesus has overcome, so do we!
Again ty for this and I’m learning not to have a hard- heart because I know its not good or right. I want to be totally heal so I can move on and be what God has bless me to be.
Amen, Renee – be healed in Jesus name!
Thank you Kimberly!
I really appreciate your encouraging emails!
You are welcome – God bless you!
Good insight Kimberly!
Thank you, April – God is good!
Kimberly- you are a sister in Christ and touch me every time you post in a very personal healing way! I am so grateful for your understanding of emotional eating and self loathing behavior! You are God’s gift to me with your ability to quote the exact right words to fill the holes I my heart and soul. Thank you for continually reaching out and sharing your gifts and wisdom!
Praising the Lord with you, Mimi! He never gives up on us so we should not give up on ourselves.
This is a wonderful message for all of us right now. With the country so divided, we must find ways to minister to those with hard hearts — and check our OWN hearts to ensure we are ministering through soft, pliable, loving hearts. I truly thank God for the wisdom He has imparted to you, and for your obedience to listen and share what you’ve learned. You are such a blessing to me!
/sg
Thank you, Shana for that confirmation on this message and what the Lord wants to say to His people at this hour! I am agreeing with you in prayer: “Lord, let us check our OWN hearts to ensure we are ministering through soft, pliable, loving hearts.” Amen!
I am praying and believing God for my lost granddaughter who has been living a lesbian life for 12 years. I know Jesus wants to and is able to deliver her.
I am agreeing with you in prayer for deliverance as well, Valerie. I also pray the following message help you to minister to her where she is as we remember what the Lord delivered us from: https://takebackyourtemple.com/open-letter-christians-gay-marriage-legalization/
I have suddenly felt my heart become cold as well and my thoughts towards the Lord. I’m so desperate to find the Lord again… I’ve been in the church for so long , accepted the Lord as my Savior. However, recently I started realizing I have not been what the Lord wanted me to be (lost time) im so dissapointed in myself & lately I’ve been seeking the Lord for a softer hard & for forgiveness for my sins & for not realizing sooner. I found myself fallen into a deep whole of depression and fear & doubt . I’ve always been the type of person who would struggle with my emotions. lately, I still seek the Lord because regardless of all I feel that he is my hope.. I just haven’t felt peaceful in my mind and heart. I pray that he forgives me truly I’m so tired of feeling this way. I’m always scared to think he will leave me.
Hi K – I am so glad that you read this message and I pray that you take the prayer within it to heart. The Lord has promised us – “Be strong and of good courage, do not fear nor be afraid of them; for the Lord your God, He is the One who goes with you. He will not leave you nor forsake you (Deuteronomy 31:6)” So we may leave God but He never leaves us! Therefore, you have no need to fear that He will leave you. In fact, when those fears come up, speak Deuteronomy 31:6 out loud in your own voice. Faith comes by hearing and hearing by God’s word. He is about restoration, not condemnation. I recommend reading Luke 15:11-32 also so that you can get a revelation about the Father’s heart of love and forgiveness toward His children. He is the best Father we can have!
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You say that the gospel will fall on deaf ears of a hardened heart and a hardened heart will not accept or believe God’s perfect love. You say the only thing that can soften a hardened heart is Jesus’ blood but then follow it with ‘… If he will believe’. You just said they won’t/can’t believe with a hardened heart! So does that mean only a believer who once knew God that has hardened their heart (but not too far gone) can get a softened heart?! How do we pray for someone who never knew God, doesn’t want to humble themselves or let their guard down to receive the truth and who is living in sin with a hard heart? If they have to come to a point of believing something their hearts are too hard to consider then…? It’s putting the cart before the horse so what hope is there for unbelieving, hurting, hardened hearts?
Hi DRobo – I appreciate your comments. Within the article itself is the answer to your question. Toward the end, I wrote a prayer for the Lord to exchange the hard-hearted person’s heart of stone for a heart of flesh according to Ezekiel 36:26. In that way, they can become responsive to the Lord’s love and conviction. Please see my prayer for the hard-hearted person within the article.
Thank you Kimberly!! There are many subtle but false teachings out there that basically say I need to soften my calloused heart. What a hopeless and condemning lie from the devil. Thank you for reminding me of the hope, grace and truth we have in our Lord!
-Steven
You are welcome, Steven! Only the power of Jesus has the power to change our hearts and only His word has the power to change our minds. True deliverance is in Him.
I don’t know what happened! Yesterday I was saved and today I feel nothing like my heart is hardened. Can I get my faith back and soften my heart? Desperately…
Hi Jonie – The enemy is deceiving you because being saved has nothing to do with how you feel. It has everything to do with your belief in God’s word and the sacrifice Jesus made for you because He loves you. I recommend you check out this resource to revisit God’s word on this matter: https://www.everystudent.com/features/know-God.html
Please pray the Lord softens my hard heart.
awwwwwl my dear sister,
My heart ached when I read your email. All is not lost.
First you must understand that God our Father in heaven will not soften your hard heart as it is something ONLY YOU can do. That would be like “making” someone to love you. Who wants forced love? God is near you just waiting for you to LOVE him so he can show himself STRONG in your life, but you must first BELIEVE that He is who He says He is and that He is a rewarder of those who diligently seek him. He wants to be in your life completely which is one of the reasons he placed it on your heart to write to us.
It is absolutely apparent to me that the enemy has been telling and showing you “LIES” about our God and “LIES” about yourself!
He is making you believe that you don’t believe in God ( unbelief) but you do according to your last two sentences ( Please pray the Lord softens my hard heart and help me to receive his Holy word. So that I can live out my life for him. )
Because God has not responded to you in a way that you felt he should, the enemy is using that to cause (confusion, anger and bitterness (your words)) in your life; which, quickly turns into resentment & rebellion.(again, your words)
The enemy will influence you by speaking to you as though you are speaking to yourself. Here’s an example: He will say something like “Where is God when you need him? He doesn’t love “ME” or else he wouldn’t have let me……”(you can finish the sentence.) Notice that he said “ME” and not “YOU” so that YOU don’t know it is HIM (the enemy speaking).
The enemy has an arsenal of weapons to use against you if you allow him to but no weapon formed against Jazimine shall prosper and all you have to do is resist him and he will flee from you quickly and in a hurry for a season.
Now here is what we need to do my dear sister. That is to pray to God for forgiveness and ask Him to help us in our daily walk.
I will pray “WITH YOU AND NOT FOR YOU”. I would like for you to say this prayer aloud to God our Father in the name of Jesus and “IF” you truly mean it, God will forgive you, bless you, love you and so much more as he smiles and smiles on you from his throne.
Heavenly Father,
I come before you with a sorrowful heart for not believing in you and for believing the lies that the enemy has placed in my head.
I am asking you to forgive me and receive me as your daughter. Show me and teach me how to be like you and create in me a new and clean heart so that I will not sin against you.
Direct my paths and open up my understanding. Help me to surround myself with other believers so that I might live in a more excellent way before you.
Meanwhile, I shall praise you even now for all you have already done unbeknownst to me and all that you are going to do in the mighty name of Jesus.
Amen
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Now, if you can say those words out loud and make them your words in all sincerity my sister, you will immediately be released from the grip of the enemy for a season as he still has power to tempt us. But now you have an advocate with our Father in Heaven that will lead you and guide when the enemy comes around.
You will be able to give him a black eye every time because all you have to do is put the Word of God on him and he’s gone. With that being said, you must stay in the Word of God so that you will always be equipped to ward off the enemy.
I am rooting for you my sister.
To God be the Glory!
Mike Taylor
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I have a hard heart. I’ve had it my whole life. I have known the truth my whole life but every time I hear the gospel or hear about God’s wrath or that we deserve hell I feel a horrible resistance and offense inside me. I try so hard to believe that God is good and to trust Him, but there are things in the Bible that so rub me the wrong way that it feels impossible to ever truly believe that God is good. I don’t feel any love for Him or for Jesus. But I want to. I believe Jesus is the Son of God, that He is the only Lord and Savior, and that God raised Him from the dead on the third day. But I am afraid this is not enough for me to be saved. I have trouble trusting Jesus because I feel so hard-hearted and anti-God. I hate it so much and am in distress and torment every single day. I cry out to Him for help and I feel no peace. I repent as best I am able but I am afraid it is never enough. I feel like I am of two minds. Like I am confessing that God is good and that I am a wrong and hell-deserving sinner – just because I want to believe these things because I know I have to believe them. But then I think I don’t really believe those things, I’m just trying really hard to believe them. It makes me fear that God does not want me, that He has turned His back on me, that I have crossed a point of no return. I just keep trying and confessing and repenting but most of the time I feel like I am fooling myself. And whenever I do feel it’s genuine, then the hard heart comes back almost immediately after. I am so scared all the time, every day. It’s awful. Some people think my problem is related to having an angry father and rebelling against him (he was a pastor). But I have forgiven him as best as I can, and I think my problem is not that but simply my inability to like the Bible and the way God does things. It all fills me with dread and disturbance rather than love and peace and hope.
Hi Tiffany, I read your comment with sadness for the needless torment you are in. I see that confusion, anger, and most of all fear are big parts of your life right now. See what I mean:
* ”I believe Jesus is the Son of God, that He is the only Lord and Savior, and that God raised Him from the dead on the third day. But I am afraid this is not enough for me to be saved.”
– Tiffany, God’s word says: ”For God so loved the world that He gave His only begotten Son, that whoever believes in Him should not perish but have everlasting life.” Do you see anything in this statement that says, ”…except Tiffany”? Jesus loved you so much that He died for your sins, no matter what they were. By denying the truth of this, you keep yourself in torment.
* ” I repent as best I am able but I am afraid it is never enough.”
– Tiffany, Jesus’ sacrifice was enough. He is not going to get back up on that cross again. Asking Him into your heart and confessing Him with your mouth is enough. See Romans 10:9-10.
* ”It makes me fear that God does not want me, that He has turned His back on me, that I have crossed a point of no return.”
– Tiffany, the devil is a liar! You are not saved because of your works. You are saved by the work Jesus already accomplished. ”But God demonstrates His own love toward us, in that while we were still sinners, Christ died for us (Romans 5:8).”
* ” I am so scared all the time, every day.”
– Tiffany, I pray the Lord perfect you in His love to cast out every fear. ”There is no fear in love; but perfect love casts out fear, because fear involves torment. But he who fears has not been made perfect in love (1 John 4:18).”
* ”It all fills me with dread and disturbance rather than love and peace and hope.”
– Tiffany, When you accept Jesus as your Savior from the heart, His Spirit comes to live within you. The fruit of His Spirit is love, joy, peace, patience, kindness, gentleness and self control.
I recommend you check out this article to get a new view of who God is and what you mean to Him:
https://takebackyourtemple.com/for-god-so-loved/
Meditate on it and have a conversation with the Lord about it. He knows what is in your heart anyway, but He is God. He can take it.
This is really good!!
Thanks Jill – I am glad you enjoyed the article. God bless you!
Thank you! This is food for my spirit!
Thank you!
Kimberly!
This is such an awesome! and uplifting message! Sometimes! I fall back to my old thinking and feeling. Forgetting God! Yaweh! has changed my stony heart and replaced it with a fleshy heart! Reading this article only makes me love my savior Yeshua! all the more! I pray! your message reaches many! They will know! how much Yaweh! Loves them to have His Son die on the cross for us! And laid all! our sins upon Him! Paid! In full!
Thank you for that testimony of the Lord’s delivering power, Mary Joy. I know you have encouraged many to trust the Lord with their hearts. When you do, your trust is NEVER misplaced!
Thank you for sharing this message dearest Kimberly. This is exactly what’s been on my mind and the Lord has been leading me to deal with in my life. I have been holding back from the Lord for so long because of my hardened heart. And now I have decided that enough is enough and want to be vulnerable before the Lord.
I am so encouraged by your message. I will be praying over my self with your prayer to guide me….
All glory to God in Jesus’ Name!
Hallelujah, Shiara – whom the Son sets free is free indeed!
I come into agreement with your prayer Kim…..amen!
Thank you Sherry – so it is DONE!
So timely! Exactly what God wanted me to hear and take in today. I will continue to contemplate this to sink into my mind and spirit. Thank you Kim in Christ
You are welcome, Anne – all glory to our Lord for His healing power. He heals to the uttermost!
God bless you, thank you!
Powerful prayer, thank you
Hi Kimberly and thank you for your wisdom and knowledge. This was such a great and inspiring article. I have struggled with my weight for most of my adult life. On and off diets but I’m realizing more and more that my struggles with my weight are not about dieting but about healing.
Thank you for your special gift of healing and I look forward to exploring your program.
Praise God, Rhoben! May He comfort and strengthen you on this journey with Him!
Deep thinking for my soul. Kim you always send the appropriate word from God at the time I need it
All praise to God Susan because He always sends the right word at the right time!
After feeling like a phony for so long, I know God’s Word would tear down anything the enemy would whisper. He’s a liar and like a lions roar only a breath that cannot speak the truth. Thanks for sharing and helping me to see the Father’s love up close and personal. God bless your ministry many times over.
Thank you for this. This prayer has helped me pray for someone who is unsaved and this prayer describes the situation she was in when I started praying to a T.
This spoke to me in many ways. Early this morning I confessed that I have a hard heart. Then I found this. It shows I’m on the right track. I suffer much trauma from sexual abuse at the hands of my own dad and uncle. I didn’t know I was so angry about it but as I write this I realized I’m very angry with God. Angry with my parents who no longer live. God took my mom home and I ask him to please bring me home because at times I feel like I can’t go on. I over eat. I’m confused of what eating plan to follow.
Hi Shannon – I am praying with you on this issue. A while back, I had a guest author write about the issue of sexual abuse and how it can affect how you see yourself and God. I urge you to check it out: How Sexual Abuse Survivors Can Heal
Thank you!!!! Thank you for this website. So full of healing information. Encouragement. God bless you
Thank you so much for this timely word, Kimberly. Your message has helped me and my grandmother to identify and break generational curses! Keep being a light and a vessel.
Thankyou so much.
Hi thanx for the response I think im basing my faith on feelings. Thankyou for showing me. I even think i committed the unpardonable sin because I told God I felt hateful feelings towards him in my heart. I will read the article.
Many years ago, I was in a painful place and said “I hate you” to God. The Lord knew I was speaking out of pain and confusion. I am certainly glad I didn’t really mean it. However, it was NOT the unpardonable sin (blasphemy against the Holy Spirit). Here is a link about what that means: https://www.gotquestions.org/blasphemy-Holy-Spirit.html.
Hello I feel like ill keep coming back to you. That day I confessed to God I had hateful feelings I felt a thing leave my chest, and the negative thoughts stopped. I had given up and thought Im lost and then today as I decided to turn back before it was too late, its like the heaviness came back and negative thoughts and prideful thoughts came bubbling over. Is this in me or what? As soon as I start professing my love for Jesus its like a war starts. Now I know its not in my heart but my chest where the heaviness is.
Hi Sanya – you have the victory in Jesus. I recommend reading the scriptures in this article OUT LOUD whenever that feeling of heaviness tries to come upon you: https://takebackyourtemple.com/gods-love-letter-to-you/.
Your words have power. When you confess the Lord’s love over yourself, especially in your own voice, that casts out fear and heaviness. Use the scriptures as faithfully as you would use medicine, applying them to yourself. May the Lord bless you!
Hi i have had a hardened heart for sometime and Ive prayed about it with the prayer from ezekiel. I feel like im not right with God until I do something but I know in my heart it is only through Jesus. I have been repenting and confessing His name and asking for his love to penetrate my heart but nothing….i need help. Now I even feel nothingness….after a deliverance session….. I feel a war inside, then fear, then nothingness.
Hi Sanya – I join you in prayer. Here’s one truth to take to heart: Just because you feel something doesn’t make it true. You said: “I feel like I’m not right with God until I do something but I know in my heart it is only through Jesus.” You said you feel that you aren’t right with God unless you do something. Well, if you know Jesus as your Savior, He already did something! He did the work of making you right with God through His crucifixion and resurrection from the dead.
All you need to do is what Romans 10:9-10 says: “that if you confess with your mouth the Lord Jesus and believe in your heart that God has raised Him from the dead, you will be saved. For with the heart one believes unto righteousness, and with the mouth confession is made unto salvation.”
If you did that, you ARE right with God whether you feel like it or not. You are right with Him because His word says so.
You also said – “I have been repenting and confessing His name and asking for his love to penetrate my heart but nothing…I need help. Now I even feel nothingness…after a deliverance session….. I feel a war inside, then fear, then nothingness.”
It seems you keep looking for a certain feeling as evidence that God loves you. Check out this article for the truth: https://takebackyourtemple.com/dont-feel-god-loves-me/
As you renew your mind to this truth and make your daily decisions based on this truth, not how you feel, then you will experience freedom in Christ!
Thank you for this spiritual awakening
I enjoyed reading the truth about the word of God and it definitely applyed to me at the present time . Please pray for me and my family. I have a Son name Joseph that in prison. Please pray for him . I need reunification in my families life and my fiance family as well. Just to say reading this lift me up in spirit and Truth …..
Kimberly, again you have blessed me. Thank you for your ministry.
I am very grateful to God for allowing me to share. All glory to Him, Janeen!
Hi Kimberly. I have just written a book on the process of hardening a heart toward God. The picture of the hardened heart with your article would be perfect for the cover of my book. Can I have permission to use it. I am a pastor and will be self- publishing this book. It would be a miracle of God to sell more than a 100 books or so. I think it is invaluable reading; but since I am an unknown author, the Lord would have to truly intervene for sales to go up. Thank you for taking a moment to respond to this.
Hi Pastor Bobby – Thanks for reaching out. Unfortunately, I do not own the copyright to the image, however you can Google “hardened heart” and click on ‘Images’ to find the original image and reach out to the copyright owner.
Thank you
Please let me know the title of your book. I need help in this area.
I told God awful thing that i did not need him or holy spirit anymore cuz people accept me and love me and then atmfter thatI was hurt by God cause heard a voice speak to me that said followed for wrong reason and reading bible won’t help you and then my heart God hardened, then I began to think Hebrew 6 happen to me after this so then I went to a church and the prophet said God is with you do you want to return if so repent and believe but something was blocking heart not realizing at moment I was believing wrong scripture either way I then thought missed opportunity to repent and believed that bit in all actuality I do and did want to return please and after that heart was hardened and I really want the Lord back and my mind not to be like a reprobate and have this hardened heart and I losing hope and faith that can’t come back or he is done with me I don’t what else to do. Marsha
Hi Marsha – I am so glad that you wrote me! It so important that you discern whether a voice you are hearing in your mind is from the Lord or the enemy. The enemy always wants to separate us from the Lord. That is the biggest clue that the voice you are hearing is from the enemy. Here is an article I wrote about that: Do you Have Spiritual Caller ID?.
Many years ago, I was in a dark, confused place and actually said to the Lord, “I hate you.” But He knew I didn’t mean it and when I came to Him, he welcomed me with open arms. Read the story of the Prodigal Son in Luke 15:11-32. That’s how the Lord is with us.
Click here For more about establishing a relationship with God or re-dedicating your life to Him.
Thanks! I needed to read this…helps me know how to pray for my spouse.
John
I am hurting badly, and so is whole family. My husband and I are going through a divorce. It should be finalized in August sometime. I do not want the divorce. My husband and I have both partook of sin in the marriage abd he is unwilling to see that I am a Christian and wants to blame and shame me and demands i repent and admit Im not a believer to prive that I am the problem. I have listened to him and prayed for forgiveness but he refuses to forgive and apologize. Im so confused as to what Gods will is since there’s been adultery on both parties side. Im hurt and want to restore the marriage. I was a Christian from the start and he was definitely not. I was living in sin with him briefly then we eloped and had a daughter. He left at the start of the pregnancy. I had two children prior to our marriage. Now he says he’s a Christian and in a church that is all Calvanist and they are wanting me to convert and repent their way to prove Im worthy of the reconciliation. I’m heartbroken. Im trusting God that His will will be done for my family. It’s been so broken. Now they won’t let hm reconcile for fear of him being not on the right course of action or whatever. I need help. Please pray. I am trying to let go and let God, but it’s so hard. Pls pray that ALL of oyr hearts are opened, softened, and restored like never before and that the kids are safe, in Jesus name amen. . Bless you. Ps I want t to be an immense beacon of love, change, and hope for those wo struggle with this in Jesus name Amen! Thanks
Nothing is too hard for the Lord. Get rooted and grounded in God’s love to heal your heart. He promised to heal the brokenhearted and bind up their wounds. Whether with your husband or part, you need to get to a place of wholeness and healing. You have my prayers.
Kimberly, dear sister in Christ! I just wanted to take a moment to thank you for your wonderful ministry and allowing God to use you! I have been receiving your emails for a few years now and always so appreciate the encouragement and Spirit led wisdom! This prayer is so beautiful and Bible-saturated. This article is also an excellent reminder to me that even as Christians, when we aren’t careful, bitterness and hardness of heart can so easily creep in from all the hurts and pains of this sin-fallen world! It is so important to be aware and keep continually seeking and coming to God and not turning to other things instead. As it’s insidiously easy to slowly stray away from Him! I have heard it said and found it to be incredibly true that we are never staying in the same place – We are always either growing closer to God or we are slipping away. Thank you for the reminder to always keep actively pursuing Him for only He can meet all our needs and heal our wounds and broken aching hearts!
I pray you and your husband are blessed and well and that God meets all your needs according to His riches in glory!
In His love and light,
~ Amber 🙂
Thank you so much for the encouragement, Amber! May the Lord continue to bless you as you grow closer to Him!
I really really enjoyed reading this this evening. It was everything my soul needed to hear. I was just wondering was it possible to be delivered from a person that always hurts me without hate and bitterness growing in me…the answer is yes. There is nothing to hard for God. I will not give this situation domain over me..I speak life and healing in my mind and in my heart. I have written the bible verse down and I will read and continue to read and let the word grow in me so I can become what God sees me as. I thank God for you and if at all possible call my name out to God and ask him to help me in my situation. God bless you always..Rhapsody Burgess
I am so glad to hear the message spoke to you Rhapsody! I stand with you in prayer that He will perfect everything that concerns you!
My heart has been hard, like the empty concrete lot you discribed. Thank you for your article. Thank you for your prayer. During the holidays my mind reverts to the past, and the distruction creeps back. But your article has opened my eyes. Jesus, free me from the pains that haunt me. Jesus, free me from my hard heart. Because of Jesus, I am free indeed.
Thank you. God bless.
I am agreeing with you in prayer of that, Teresa – all praise to God for His deliverance!
I read your article that you wrote about in charisma Magazine and i have to say that it was one of the best articles that they PUBLISHED! it truly made me cry, not because I have a hard heart but because I have ministered to my husband that has a hard heart and I tell you it’s no easy road. I love my husband and want him to see the love of Christ, so I allow Christ’s love to radiant through me and allow my actions to show forth and speak of his greatness. I just loved the words you wrote and it was a eye opening read. I tell you that God has given my husband a heart of flesh as a result of my endless prayers and relentless love towards him. Thanks so much for writing this with your heart and allowing Holy Spirit to speak through you! amen
Thank you so much, Misha! Yours is a testimony of a virtuous woman. You stood in the gap for your husband and prevailed! Your husband truly found a good thing in you and receives favor from the Lord because of it. Thank you for writing!
I so needed this devotional on softening a hardened heart. Thank you for letting God use you to help others! I am dealing with this and what you said just lit the lightbulb! I’m using a hardened heart to protect me from hurt. But only Gods love can heal! Please pray for me in this area and God bless you and your ministry.
I pray for you Tiffany. The Lord has so much more for you. It begins with opening up your heart to Him to receive what He has for you – especially love.
Kimberly, I LOVED your “controversial video” !!!! You covered a lot of truth in there. Great job!
Regarding your message above and heartened hearts, I’ve worked with a ministry for years (Healing Hearts Ministries) that does a great job helping those who need healing from past hurts. I found the online bible study years ago and it walked me through scriptures that helped to tenderize my heart to forgive my offenders. Since leading the study at my church, I can clearly see how easy it is to fall in the trap of being a victim instead of walking in victory. For me I had become angry with God thinking He had not heard my prayers, but looking back with a different perspective can clearly see Gods love for me, and that the problem is sin, and how mankind will act when apart from God.
A lot of your message above reminded me of what I learned in that study of Gods word, and I’m so thanful to have been set free from bitterness to a renewed trust in the Lord.
I’m still working on trusting Him fully with the eating thing, and I’m going to have to go listen to your “controversial video again” because I’m so ready to walk in victory over this food (sin) issue!!
I’m truly thankful for the Lord giving you the persistence to to share this message of hope. After trying and trying to get this right, I think I’m finally hearing!!!
With love,
Lorraine
Wonderful, Lorraine! I am glad you found the video helpful. The Lord always meets us where we are. I thank Him that even though we may leave Him, He never leaves nor forsakes us. He is committed to completing the good work He has already started in you. May He continue to bless you richly on this journey!
I really enjoyed this devotional. I needed it
I praise God Sherri and thank Him it helped you.
that was really good
Thank you, Sherry – God be praised!
Thank you I really got a lot out of this. I have been going through a lot. I have also been struggling with other things. Please keep me in prayer.